Saturday, December 27, 2008
[Fiona] Once Upon A...
Time. We are all to some degree obsessed with time. There never seems to be enough time. What time we do have we waste. Time is not likely to be saved or savored. Time is elusive. You think you have a handle on it only to find out you didn't have as much of it as you needed. It drives me crazy. I don't know if anybody out in blog land noticed that I haven't blogged any entries in quite some time. That would be because my head was lodged very far into my butt cheeks. I am sorry. I started blogging as a method to keep my sanity in check. Somehow I let that nasty critter time get away from me and I have been having a bitch of a time getting any time to blog. Thus the naming of my post. I will try to be better about that. Later...when I can find the time...;^)
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
[Shrek & Fiona] Our Heartfelt Holiday Message
As we are now in the holiday season, please accept our heartfelt holiday greeting:
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2009, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "America" in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:
This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
Any and all applicable taxes that arise from accepting this greeting are the sole responsibility of the wishee.
Yours neutrally,
Shrek & Fiona
Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low stress, non-addictive, gender neutral, celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.
We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling, and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2009, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great (not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country or is the only "America" in the western hemisphere), and without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, or sexual preference of the wishee.
By accepting this greeting, you are accepting these terms:
This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for her/himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law, and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year, or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
Any and all applicable taxes that arise from accepting this greeting are the sole responsibility of the wishee.
Yours neutrally,
Shrek & Fiona
Monday, December 22, 2008
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