[Shrek] Eye Catching Headline

[Shrek] In other words...

2010 Top 25 Engineer's Terms and Expressions
(What they say versus what it means)

1. A number of different approaches are being tried.
We are still guessing at this point.

2. Close project coordination.
We sat down and had coffee together.

3. An extensive report is being prepared on a fresh approach.
We just hired three punk kids out of school.

4. Major technological breakthrough!
It works OK; but looks very hi-tech!

5. Customer satisfaction is believed assured.
We are so far behind schedule, that the customer will take anything.

6. Preliminary operational tests were inconclusive.
The darn thing blew up when we threw the switch.

7. Test results were extremely gratifying!
Unbelievable, it actually worked!

8. The entire concept will have to be abandoned.
The only guy who understood the thing quit.

9. It is in process.
It is so wrapped in red tape that the situation is completely hopeless.

10. We will look into it.
Forget it! We have enough problems already.

11. Please note and initial.
Let's spread the responsibility for this.

12. Give us the benefit of your thinking.
We'll listen to what you have to say as long as it doesn't interfere with what we have already done or with what we are going to do.

13. Give us your interpretation.
We can't wait to hear your bull.

14. See me or let's discuss.
Come to my office, I've screwed up again.

15. All new.
Parts are not interchangeable with previous esign.

16. Rugged.
Don't plan to lift it without major equipment.

17. Robust!
Rugged, but more so

18. Light weight.
Slightly lighter than rugged

19. Years of development.
One finally worked

20. Energy saving.
Achieved when the power switch is off.

21. No maintenance.
Impossible to fix

22. Low maintenance.
Nearly impossible to fix

23. Fax me the data.
I'm too lazy to write it down.

24. We are following the standard!
That's the way we have always done it!

25. I didn't get your e-mail.
I haven't checked my e-mail for days.

[Shrek] Long Time, Eh?

Both Fiona and I have been busy lately, and unfortunately the blog is one of the things that got pushed to the back burner. That means we missed posting our annual holiday greeting....that just keeps it fresh for next holiday season.

With 2009 being long over, here's the list of books I finished during the year.

The Confession (Sheldon Siegel) ...423
My War (Andy Rooney) ...313
By Order of the President (W.E.B. Griffin) ...624
The Hostage (W.E.B. Griffin) ...750
The Hunters (W.E.B. Griffin) ...815
The Shooters (W.E.B. Griffin) ...737
Silent Snow (Steve Thayer) ...407
His Majesty's Dragon (Naomi Novik) ...356
Throne of Jade (Naomi Novik) ...400
Black Powder War (Naomi Novik) ...365
Empire of Ivory (Naomi Novik) ...400
God's Spy (Juan Gómez-Jurado) ...360
The Last Patriot (Brad Thor) ...480
Santa Olivia (Jacqueline Carey) ...341
Body Count (P.D. Martin) ...376
Victory of Eagles (Naomi Novik) ...376
Kushiel's Mercy (Jacqueline Carey) ...808
Empire (Orson Scott Card) ...351
Child 44 (Tom Rob Smith) ...509
Honor Bound (W.E.B. Griffin) ...550
Blood and Honor (W.E.B. Griffin) ...723
Secret Honor (W.E.B. Griffin) ...609
Death and Honor (W.E.B. Griffin) ...771
Secret of the Seventh Son (Glenn Cooper) ...393
Havemercy (Jaida Jones & Danielle Bennett) ...431
Extreme Measures (Vince Flynn) ...430
Rough Weather (Robert B. Parker) ...320
Knight Life (Peter David) ...343
Hostile Intent (Michael Walsh) ...407
The Murderers' Club (P.D. Martin) ...440
Banquo's Ghosts (Rich Lowry & Keith Korman) ...344
Fan Mail (P.D. Martin) ...475

Total pages read: 15,327

Even though I don't have a wager for this year (yet), I'll still list what I'm reading on the right because it garnered much conversation in the "real world".

Hopefully we'll be able to find time for more posts.